big sister, little brother

By the looks of the pics, I should title this big brother, little sister! But I'm going by birth order here, not who is taller. Jessie is actually wearing tall high heels, so this picture doesn't really do Andrew's height justice. I'm three inches shorter than Jessie, so you can imagine what I look like up against Andrew. 

Sigh ...

Jessie took Andrew on a date the other night, so I'm simply posting these pictures as proof that just because babies grow up ... they don't lose their cuteness. 

Amen? 

 

You don't suppose this post had anything to do with the date idea, do you?

Nah. Me either. 

And I'm posting this one to show off for your viewing pleasure. 

they stand at the door and knock, knock, knock

To all the boys who think they love my daughter,

I know it's hard. My daughter is beautiful. She's funny, perky, supportive, intelligent, and fun to be around. And much to your pleasant surprise, she's once again ... single.

You know what that means?

What's that?

No. It does not mean that you can begin showing up on my doorstep to take her here, there, and everywhere. And no, it does not mean that you can write her love letters. Or call incessantly. And don't even try to play that "my shoulder is here for you to cry on" game. Do you really want a gal on the rebound? Stop listening to your raging, popping hormones and THINK. It's been one week since her and her fiance broke up.

ONE. WEEK. That's seven days, for those of you who are uneducated.

Now, here's what my daughter's new "single" status on facebook means. It means that she's come to the conclusion that marriage isn't for her right now. You don't need to know the reasons. All you need to do is respect them. And her. And me. And her father. And her sister. And her brother. Yes, her brother and sister. Are you ignorant to the fact that when a serious relationship starts in a family, it affects each member? We begin to love the person who (by dating my daughter) is a candidate to become a son-in-law to us. When that relationship is broken, we all grieve.

But more importantly ... is it in her best interest to start another relationship at this time (remember, we're thinking with our brains here, not our hormones)? When you flock to my doorstep, ring my doorbell, or write her letters, are you thinking of her? Do you realize that's what a healthy relationship consists of? Thinking of others first? First. As in ... before you.

Some of you may be wracking your brain, thinking, "Oh dear me, what could I do to impress Mr. and Mrs. C so that they would approve of me dating Jessica?" If that's what you're thinking, you've already failed. Because I just asked you not to knock on our door. Or maybe you're saying, "You're the mom. Who cares what you think? Jessie's a big girl, and she can make her own decisions."

You're absolutely correct, but again - you fail. Jessica does not require our approval. She's legally an adult, and therefore can do whatever she pleases. But if you were any sort of gentleman, you'd be seeking our advice and approval, just as Jessica does.

I know it's counter-cultural, but there's a little thing we like to call respect around our house. Respect for others, but more pointedly, respect for our elders. Why have respect for our elders? Because they're older. And wiser. And (news flash!) people who have been married for over 20 years tend to know a few things about making a marriage work. If you are too proud to ask for help, adivce, and wisdom from others, you aren't good enough. And you guessed it .... you FAIL.

Have you ever heard of Voddie Bauchum?

Go ahead, Desperado. Google that.

On second thought, save yourself the typing. If you don't know who he is, then you'll have no idea what we as parents expect from someone dating our daughter, and again, you have failed.

Are you feeling tested?

Good. Because that's basically what dating is. It's a test. A test to see whether you would make a good husband, father, lifetime mate, lover, and leader of a family. And guess who administers the test? Yep, you guessed it. Mr. C and yours truly. So forget about sweet talkin' Jessie into believing you're groom worthy, or even date worthy, and thinking you've passed some sort of unwritten test. Because (another news flash!) it's not solely about what Jessie thinks. There are people who love her and are here to protect her against hormonal, raging idiots that wander in from the streets.

If being tested scares you away, good. It proves that all you would want in a relationship is the funny, and the beautiful. In other words ... you're shallow, and relying on your hormones to do your thinking.

So, farewell shallow boys. Come back in five, ten, fifteen years, when you've studied what it means to be a real husband, father, and home leader. When you've got some kind of financial ability to care for a family, and when you've been knocked around hard enough to know that R-E-S-P-E-C-T is a good and godly trait ... and absolutely essential to succeeding in life ... especially in this household (know ye not that when a person marries, he/she marries a whole family?).

Until then, we will continue to lead and instruct Jessica as well as we can into becoming the kind of wife and mother God desires her to be. We'll all do our part. You do your part. And then (and only then!) will we even be interested in seeing your ugly mug on our doorstep.

Yes, that's right. Being hot! is not a pre-requisite.

There. I've given you some hope.

Dutifully yours,

Mrs. C

off to boot camp

In case you're wondering why Jessie was feeling akin to Eeyore this last Monday .....

It's because Peter (on the left) was sworn in .....

To the Marine Corps ....

While we watched ....

.....ever so proudly. And while we're sad that we will not see him for four months (boot camp plus school), we are proud and thankful that he has chosen to serve his country. I, personally, am thankful for his newfound friend, Drew, whom he met the morning he shipped off. Within minutes of meeting Drew, I could tell that he was an exceptionally good kid. He'll be a good friend to Peter and vice versa. I don't know about Peter ... but that makes me feel better about sending him away. I thought it was kind of ironic how they looked like brothers, dressed the same, and had so much in common.

Is God good, or what?

We love you, Peter. I am praying for you and Drew both, that God would strengthen you physically, mentally, and spiritually. And that you would rely on Him to do just that ... and not on yourselves.

Please hurry home. There's someone here I'm taking care of for you while you're gone, but something tells me I'm a poor substitute.

Thoughts Of A Mother-In-Law To Be

Ahem!! Remember this couple? Yeah, the ones getting married in 18 days? Yeah, them. Ashlee will be home on Saturday!!! Sister Jessie is out in Georgia as I "speak" having a week long party with Daniel, Ashlee, and Peter before driving back with Ashlee, Peter, and Daniel's best man, Eric.

Clear as mud? Good!

It's been challenging to plan a wedding so far apart, but I think we've done fairly well. Having said that, the you know what might hit the fan when Ashlee gets here and it dawns on us what we've forgotten. However, if that happens, I'm sure I will be cool, calm, and collected. Because Prairie Girls .... they're always dignified like that, mmmhmmm.

All dresses are bought (but not all have not come to the house yet - including mine), flowers are ordered, cake is ordered, church is reserved, reception is planned. Now if we can get all the decorations made and in order, ready to take to the chapel, I think we'll be doing good.

At least I'd like to think so.

I woke up Monday in a panic that was bigger than Texas, and I determined that it was absolutely necessary for me to put an end to it. The hymn "Moment by Moment" immediately came to my mind, and I've chosen to focus on the lyrics (even though I loathe the tune), and at the same time, asking for grace in time of need. God is faithful, and He has helped me to literally live moment by moment. Granted, that does not mean that I don't do any planning. I still make my lists and check them twice. But I want, nay need, to operate on a moment by moment basis. Any operation that requires keeping track of a lot of details has the potential to make me suffer near panic attacks. Definitely not my forte, and therefore, I am in need of an extra dose of grace and help in my time of need.

Honest and true - I am looking forward to the 24th!! I will see lots of family, friends, take lots of pictures (which is becoming more and more a love of mine) and I get to wear a pretty dress (vain, I know). In a lot of ways, it will be sad, simply because my daughter is moving away - really far away. My husband will "give her away", although if anything ever happened to Daniel, she knows we would be right here to catch her. But the "giving away" is not for the faint. She's been in our care her entire life of nineteen years.  Perhaps this is where Corrie ten Boom's advice to "hold all things loosely, so God will not have to pry them out of my hands" should be heeded. It's not that I am unwilling to let go of her. It's just that, in the letting go, I look down to see rose colored imprints on my palms and fingers. But I know that with time, this too shall pass ...

So come April24th, as I look on, Shaun will take one last walk with Ashlee as his very own, down the petal laced aisle, to meet her bridegroom in holy matrimony. Our little arrow that we have hopefully taken from our quiver of three, shot into this world to make it a better place, and to further His gospel. From that day forward, she will still be our daughter, but she will primarily be Daniel's helpmeet, his confidant, his lover ... and so much more. Such potential to be an arrow that will go far, make an impact, and hit whatever target the Lord gives her to hit. This is my sincere hope and prayer for her. And although it will not happen because of our excellent markmanship skills, I trust it will happen because God has the power to direct our precious little arrow in whatever direction He wishes. I trust Him fully with my little arrow ... in spite of my frail aim.

Much love to both Ashlee and Daniel as they embark on this crazy, exciting, wonderful, and (at times) painful thing called marriage. Always know that you are loved, prayed for, and cherished.

Much love,

Your Mama on the Prairie

Engagement Announcement

Daniel and Ashlee

April 24th, 2010

This Prairie Mama loves both of you dearly. May you always love one another as Christ loves the Church. We wish you all the best and look forward to many happy years of being one, big, happy family!!!

Picture Post!

Anybody up for some pictures?

I hope so!

I thought I'd simply post a few from our busy weekend. Daniel came to see us. Ok, he mainly came to see Ashlee. But he did a good job of making us feel like he came to see us all. Ha!

So...the pics:


This is Andrew and I at the airport, right after we said goodbye to Daniel. I guess he's protecting me from terrorists ...

Or something.


We took a few snapshots before church. Jessie was running late so she didn't get in on them. Daniel does not help me feel tall, that's for sure!





At the airport again. I think they got a little bored waiting for boarding time.

Ashlee, Daniel .... and the Chick-fil-A cow. ;)

Lookin' good, lookin' fine....

The tall ones.

Daniel was able to meet a lot of the extended family, and we were able to talk face to face, and get to know him better. I mean, yes, we've known him since he was about seven. But there was an eight year gap where we moved away and lost touch. So while I feel like he's an old friend, there's still lots of getting to know each other that needs to be done. As you can imagine, that's difficult when he's a couple thousand miles away.

Shaun preached that morning, as our Pastor was away. He is at seminary as I speak, and we'll be glad when it's all over and we'll be able to simply minister. I'm not sure "simply minister" would ever be an accurate phrase. I know it's not simple. It's hard work, stressful, rewarding, challenging, etc. But it's God's work, and that is what we are called to. So in that sense, I am looking forward to it.

'Nuff said.

As for this week, we're doing everything from hunting, to cooking up a storm for the hunters, to dressing up for the church Trunk or Treat activity.

So ya'll come back soon for what is bound to be some seriously ridiculous pictures!!!

~Brenda

Drive by blogging.

It's what I do now days.

Why so hurried? Well, here's a few reasons:


***I am in the process of getting ready for company. Dan'l -- the boy my daughter is head over heels in love with (her words) is coming to see us on Friday, and will spend the weekend with us. He plans to meet some of the extended family, go to church with us, and simply get to know each other a little better. Obviouly not a long visit, but we are really looking forward to it. If you want to get to know Dan'l better, go here.

***Shaun is preaching on Sunday, because our Pastor is out of town. This doesn't require much of me, except giving him time to study, more praying and ... wringing of hands. Maybe not all in that order.

***Shaun's sisters just visited from out of town. They came to see Jeanine, of course. And by the way, Jeanine is doing well, considering. Since they removed the brain tumor, and now that she is off of all meds from the surgery, she is looking like her normal self. And oh how I love her little self. Now she is undergoing chemo and radiation. She did have a struggle with the chemo at first, but they've added a med that helps her keep the chemo (and her lunch!) where it ought to stay.

***Shaun and Andrew will be going hunting in a week or so. This usually means lots of preparation, and this year is no different. I'm excited for them, because it will be just the two of them this year. I can't wait to hear the survival stories, and more than that, I can't wait for my freezer to be full. No pressure, guys. ;) And by the way, if you're reading this, and you are shocked and appalled that we would be hunters ... keep it to yourself, and don't open that can of worms. You know ... for the sake of keeping peace on this blog. Ha!

***Secretary work. If you remember, I'm the secretary for our little church plant that we've been attending for about three years now ... or maybe it's four! While this does take a bit of my time, it's worth it. I can't say that I enjoy all of the work, but I always enjoy helping. And I actually do enjoy much of the work. Especially if it involves emailing, writing, helping missionaries, etc. All right down my alley!

***Doctor's appointments and procedures. My life has been full of them lately. However, this week ... no appointments or procedures scheduled!! Woot woot! I do have to start a new med, which I have so far cowered away from. I'm sorry!!! But I know it's not going to sit well with my tummy, and yet ... if you want to be cured, you have to do what the doctor says. You can't go in and tell him his suggestion didn't work if you haven't tried it. So there ya' go. Do I have to take the pill? Yes, I have to take the pill. Somebody give me some motivation here, because that's not quite cutting it for me. I am, at times, a horrible patient. Especially when it comes to conventional medicine, aka pill popping at it's finest. Bluh.

So there you have it. My life the last week. It's hectic, it's stressful, and it's awesome all at once. This is what God has put on my plate right now, and I am more and more accepting of whatever it is that He gives me. Note that I didn't say I was good at managing it all! I said I was good at accepting it. But I suppose that is a start. Because years ago, my tendency would have been to simply run from it all. Whether that be ignore it, move away from it, or get severely depressed from it all.

After reading the above, you might ask what it is that is really all that stressful. Well, to start, I didn't name everything and every challenge me or a loved one is going through. But yes, a lot of this is just "life."

Some people deal with everyday challenges better than others. And I would say that I have never really learned to deal with everyday stress and what most people would consider "normal." Add to that the health problems (of me and my family), and the stresses that our close family is going through right now, and it's a prescription for anxiety, depression, and ... running.

But don't worry. I'm not going anywhere.

I won't run. I won't hide. I will deal, with God's help, with what He has given me to deal with. He is the one in control. It's my job to trust Him, ask Him for help, and draw strength from Him.

Is it not good that we have that kind of Savior? Folks that "trust" in Buddha ... in dead gods ... they have no hope. Nobody to draw strength from. No living well to quench their very real spiritual thirsts.

I am thankful for the opportunity to trust in Him. And without the troubles, why would I need to trust Him? Lean on Him?

I wouldn't.

So thank you, Lord, for the troubles. Help me to trust in You, not in my own strength. Help me to only be refreshed by You, and not turn to what the world would tell me quenches my thirsts and longings. So many distractions, and yet You are the One who satisfies and is so faithful. Help me to keep my eyes focused on you ... whether the waves be calm or tumultuous.

Amen!

~Brenda

Destination Revealed

Wow! I have a whoppin' 30 minutes to write you a blog post! I'm sooo excited! I've missed my Lovely Lurkers. Thanks for hopping on over, and not giving up on me.

My love for blogging has not ceased, thank you very much. But unfortunately, a lot of my blogging time has.

Anyway, glad to be back in the saddle again. Out here on the prairie. With my hair flappin' in the wind, the breeze and sunshine whisping across my face ....

Ahem!

Back to reality ...

Ashlee is thousands of miles in the air as I "speak." I'm excited for her to be back from her trip ...

But I'm not sure the feeling is mutual.

Boys do that to young girls.

That's right. She went to see a boy.

An Airman.

She's been in the south, far away from this prairie, far away from everything she's ever known, but not far from my thoughts.

However, I'm not so sure but what we were far from her thoughts.

Why?

Because young love is terribly distracting. It makes you forget your cell phone. It makes you not answer your cell phone when your mother texts you. And it makes you downright ....

Twitterpated.

Yep, that's right. Ashlee's gone off the deep end. Into the sea of suffocating romance and smooshyness.

What's that? You want to meet him?

Suuuuure!!

Here he is when he came to visit last April - or perhaps it was May. I lose track.




His name is Daniel (hence the attempt to get just his name in the above pic) and we've known him since he was about seven.

His father was our Pastor for nearly ten years.

His mother played a crucial role in my life from the time I was a VERY young mother to my late twenties.

His sister and I used to play the piano together in church.

He used to turn my music pages for me as a little boy - and he did a darn good job of it!

He's about to make Captain in the Air Force.

He's 26.

He's a strong Christian.

He's fun to be around.

He's respectful towards Shaun and I.

He's very affectionate.

He's very sentimental.

He's very giving.

He's smarter than a whip.

My point?

My point is that I like him.

Excuse me while I grovel in that ... but honestly, I haven't like most of the boys Ashlee has brought home. So this is new and refreshing to me.

And I think they're cute together, to boot.

Don't you?



So please excuse me while I relish in my thankfulness to the Lord for bringing them together. And trust me ... it WAS Him that did this.

But that, my Lovely Lurkers, is another blog post!!!

~Brenda

That Time of the Month

I gotchya' with that title, didn't I?

I'm not talking about THAT time of the month. I'm talking about the time of the month that my house usually gets filled with these:








Ben gave the roses to Ashlee last night, because it's their "eighth month anniversary." Then he brought the yellow flowers this morning, because ... well ... just because.

I just loooove fresh flowers around the house, and if it takes someone doting over my daughter to get some, then so be it. My budget certainly doesn't allow it, nor do I have a very green thumb.

Mind you, I didn't let Big Ben get off without a little teasing. I answered the door this morning when he came to give Ashlee the flowers. Without missing a beat, I said with mouth wide open, hand on my chest, "Oooohhh Ben!!! For meeeee? Thank you SOOOO much. That was SOOOOO sweet of you!"

Hey, if the guys can't put up with a little grief, they don't deserve to take my daughter on a picnic.

Truthfully, Ben was gracious as usual and simply handed the flowers to me, showing every pearly white he possesses.

Having said that, I also identify with Jim Bishop when he said ...

“Watching your daughter being collected by her date feels like handing over a million dollar Stradivarius to a gorilla.”

Amen and amen.

~Brenda